Seasonal Wellness: Spring

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Okay, I might be just a tad late to the party on this post.  Spring comes quickly in Minnesota, and with it a short window for me to turn gardens, re-build fences, and other projects before my seedlings turn into teenagers and hit the garden bed. Luckily, we have another month in the Northern hemisphere before we technically start summer.  So let’s get crackin’:

Seasonal Wellness explained

It’s been my experience that we can learn a great deal from nature.  We are a unified whole, meaning we are reflected in nature and nature is reflected in us. This is referred to as “mirroring.” Living in Minnesota, I get the full taste of every season, and in every season there is a natural rhythm that I find reflected in myself:

  • Spring brings cleansing, intention, and rebirth
  • Summer is growth, action, and extroversion
  • Fall is the great harvest, a time to celebrate, take inventory and release the old and dying
  • Winter is the unconscious, a time of inner reflection, and rest.

Seasonal wellness simply means that you live in rhythm with the cycles of nature. We can tap into and use this energy to live in balance with the natural cycles of wellness that nature provides. All we need to do is look to nature for guidance.

Cleanse, Release, Rebirth

Spring is the energy of rebirth. Although, in my experience, it’s mighty difficult to spring forth something anew, if you’re still swimming in old stuff.  And I’m not just talking about holey socks. I’m really serious about spring cleaning in my world. To me, the more that I am willing to cleanse and release, the more space I am making for new growth to take place - just ask my grapevines.

To jump start your own season of new growth here are some of the most powerful spring cleaning practices I use. We’re going to start first with clearing space: this is your home, apartment, room or office. In following posts, we’ll be exploring cleansing the mind, body, emotions, and spirit.

Space Cleaning

This one is the most obvious, and yet the most misunderstood.  Quite frankly, I could write a series of blog posts on this particular practice alone, but I’ll cut to the good stuff.

After two of my dear friends were fundamental in helping me land into my first house, I gifted each of them with a book on Feng Shui. I am a big proponent of Feng Shui. I believe that our consciousness is reflected in the space we keep.  After both reading the book, I got multiple calls and emails telling me just how much they appreciated the gift and the huge difference it made in their homes and in their lives. Like our minds, our homes unconsciously collect stuff and after weeks, months, even years of occupying a space it’s easy to allow bad energy to collect and go unnoticed.

Think about it: Have you ever stepped into a space and just felt good? Energy flows really well through the space.  Plants grow, fresh air and light, happy people, beauty all around you.

Ever stepped into a space that made you feel bad, ill or confined? Energy feels trapped, stagnant and even oppressive. Think about that space.  Was anything growing there?  Were the people happy?

Whether we’re aware of it or not, the space we keep deeply impacts our feelings in everyday life.  Just check-in with yourself and the space you keep:

Can you start and finish projects with ease?
Do you feel joyful, optimistic and light-hearted?
How are the relationships within your home?
If it’s an office, how do people feel when they arrive compared to when they leave?
What grows in your home?

Now that we’ve created a bit of awareness, let me offer some of my favorite tools for cleansing your space:

Creating Space by Decluttering

Sounds simple.  Essentially, decluttering is donating, fixing, or finding the proper place for your items. Because this is a fairly straight-forward method to space cleansing, let me offer a few things you may not have considered when decluttering space in the past.

Joy: Ask yourself honestly when considering an item: Does this bring me joy? Often times we are gifted with something or held onto something for so long, we don’t ask ourselves how an object makes us feel. We can even feel obligated to hang onto something that was a gift. When we let go of items that don’t bring us joy, we release our own sense of obligation, and create an opportunity for that item to bring joy in someone else's home.

Defining ourselves by the past: Old, outdated photographs are a big one. Look at the images and art that surrounds your house.  Do you have positive, loving feelings with the people in those images? Or are you surrounded with mementos from old relationships, jobs, or painful experiences?  For me, books are a big one.  I am a big reader.  I look on my shelves and ask the question: Are these books I would read now? When I clear out old books and information, it creates space for me to be inspired by new ideas and inspiration.

Symbols: I remember catching a clip of a reality TV show where a very sick woman was bedridden and above her headboard were preserved, dead butterflies. (Butterflies are usually considered a the totem of transformation - think about what having a dead butterfly would then imply).

If you were to walk into the space you occupy and look on your walls, not knowing anything about the person living there, what information would you learn about yourself?  Symbols speak to our subconscious mind. If we surround ourselves with images that evoke feelings of lack, limitation, loneliness, and sadness then that is a good indication of the information we are feeding our subconscious mind.

In your office, ask yourself: Are the photos and items indicative of the place I want to be in my career or livelihood?  
In your bedroom, if you’re seeking a relationship: Are the images of one solitary person? Or are they of two love birds or images that support your desires?  And if you are married, or have children: Are the images in your bedroom supportive of a loving couple and romance?  Or are images of friends, children, or work surrounding and infringing on your personal relationship space?  

Be intentional, and release anything that isn’t the truth of who you want to become.

Quick tips:

  1. Remove anything dead from your home, particularly plants.
  2. If you have difficulty growing plants, well-placed silk plants and crystals (especially in windows) can bring good energy and flow to a space.
  3. Closets, basements, and book shelves typically collect a lot of stuff.  A thorough sweep in spring is a great way to refresh these areas.
  4. Clear first. If I know I’m in need of new clothing, I go through my closet first to see if there is anything I haven’t worn in awhile. Likewise, I clear my yard before I plant. By clearing out first, we create space for new growth.
  5. Bless and release.  Before dropping off a donation, I always give thanks for the items I have to give, I also intend for these items to be a blessing into the lives of someone else. When you send good energy out, good energy flows in.

It’s a wonderful feeling to physically cleanse a space, you can feel the opportunity all around you, the ultimate gift of spring.  In the next blog post, I’ll give some tools for taking this same energy to the mind, body, emotional, and spiritual aspects of our lives.  Until then, happy spring and happy cleaning.

Seasonal Wellness: Fall

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The days become shorter and what remains falls from the trees and the vines, as we usher in the season of fall.

To recap: I am writing posts on seasonal wellness, starting with the season of spring. If you are new to this series, here’s a quick snapshot: “Seasonal wellness simply means that you live in rhythm with the cycles of nature. We can tap into and use this energy to live in balance with the natural cycles of wellness that nature provides. All we need to do is look to nature for guidance.”  Seasonal Wellness: Spring

Fall: Harvest, Giving Thanks, and Release of the Dead & Dying

As I look out my window writing this, there is a light drizzle of rain. My sedum has turned rose-tipped, birds fly overhead. There’s a hint of color turning in the leaves. It will continue this way until the trees are bare, it’s a spectacular grand finale here in Minnesota.

Fall offers us the opportunity to rejoice, give thanks, learn, take inventory, and then release the dead and dying.

HARVEST & GIVING THANKS

It is honorable to bless the journey.

When we pluck the ripe tomato from the vine, it’s easy to forget that every fruit, every tree, started as a tiny seed.  In gardening, we learn to pick the plants that provide the tastiest, most-robust produce and save the seeds for next year. This simple act, acknowledging what’s working, helps to refine and transform a garden.

So we know I’m talking about life here, right?

Since January you have planted many seeds, watched things grow and fall apart. As you look back on those months, it’s important to acknowledge all the things that have worked: moments, travels, projects, and new friends. Acknowledge and bless all the good things, however big, however small.

If you are like me, and you want to go deep, let me suggest a practice I use every fall: a 30-day gratitude practice. This simple technique written about and introduced to me through my sister-in-law, Josie Robinson, has created tremendous growth for myself and others. For details on her book and this practice, you can visit Josie here: josierobinson.com

RELEASE THE DEAD & DYING

In our acknowledgement of what is working, it is equally important to bring attention to the areas of our life that are not working. If you look at the gardener in fall, he or she is cleaning out the remnants of plants that no longer bear fruit and composting what remains. A gardener knows that, come spring, the compost will help to regenerate the soil for new growth.  

The process of death and letting go teaches us about life.

RELEASING ATTACHMENT

Attachments come in all forms. We can become attached to people, habits, things, even energy. Not all attachments are bad, only that sometimes we move through our lives without awareness regarding the things that fill our spirit and the things that deplete our spirit. Fall is a great time for taking inventory.

You might want to ask yourself: Are there people, places or things in my life that no longer serve me?

The truth is that until we’re able to recognize what’s just not working anymore, we clutter our lives with draining forces that get in the way of future opportunities, new ideas, relationships, and resources.

Let’s take a closer look at the process of releasing attachment:

Career & Projects

As a facilitator, I learned that I cannot help all people. Everyone is in a different stage of their journey, some people are open, ready and inclined to heal their lives.  And others of us are not. It doesn’t mean that one is better than the other, only that desire and willingness are necessary to catalyze positive change. I learned quite quickly, that the desire needs to rest within the client, not just the facilitator. Though rare, there have certainly been a client or two that I have graciously needed to bless and release. I know, that should the desire come knocking for that client, my door will open and the work can begin.

So let me ask you: in your line of business, are there people or projects (or project people, for that matter) that stifle your ability to do your work? Or perhaps you spend your working energy doing things that are not in your “zone of genius?”

To release this attachment, it’s important to set boundaries. The easiest way to set a boundary is to ask yourself: What do I need to be successful (with my clients / on a project / at work)? Outline what those basics are and make a commitment to release all people, projects, and energy drains that rest outside these boundaries.

People

Negative relationships can cause mental, emotional, physical and spiritual toxicity in our lives. Some toxic relationships are easy to spot, and others slow moving, and require us to step out of energetic autopilot to identify. An easy way to bring more awareness to toxic relationships is to look at the energetic exchange that is taking place:

  • When you are around this person, do you feel inspired, happy, able to give and receive?  Or do you find yourself over-giving, taken advantage of, and drained?
  • If you leave your house in a good mood, does that high vibrational frequency match when you share space with this person?  Or do you feel slightly or radically depressed when you leave an interaction with this person?
  • Have you established boundaries, or communicated concerns in the past, but the patterns of imbalance continue?
  • Do you like who you are around this person?

To release this attachment, it’s important to release imbalanced energetic exchanges. This can be done verbally, by communicating what you are no longer willing to contribute to - (remember, others can only take your energy if you give him or her permission).

Another way to release attachment to people is through a "bless and release" visualization. To do this, visualize yourself and the other person in your mind's eye.  Thank this individual for what you have learned or gained in the process of this relationship.  Visually see yourself cutting the cords between you and this person.  You may recognize certain cords, for instance, a cord that symbolizes emotional co-dependency, or a cord of hurt feelings from a trauma or experience with this person. You might decide that all cords between you and this individual need to be cut. With your arm (in the visualization), cut the cords.  Say aloud a verbal affirmation, such as: “I am cutting the cords of our energetic relationship [or specific cords], I release all negative mental, emotional, physical and spiritual attachment to [person’s name] now. Good bye. And so it is.”  If you need to remove physical totems of this person in your life (photos, gifts) that is also a suggestion. A sage cleanse following a release is also recommended.  You can repeat this process as much as needed. Be gentle with yourself in the process of letting go.

Belief Systems

Negative systems of belief are also recommended to clear at this time.  If there are experiences, mistakes, and / or regrettable decisions made about yourself, money, life, relationships - fall is a great time to release these.

To release this attachment, my favorite tool (aside from Emotional Healing) is a fire ceremony. My sister-in-law, Josie, and I are partial to this process.  Perhaps because we are both Leos, and perhaps because fire is one of the most catalyzing elements of change. This is a form of Phoenix energy, burning away old thought systems into the ashes that catalyze new growth. To do this, we simply write thought systems on paper, or find items that symbolize thought systems, and put each one into the fire. We bless and release each as they fall into the flame. Following the ceremony, you may want to state a positive intention for the future, or recite positive affirmations.

This is a great ceremony to do among like-minded friends, a lot of energy can be moved in groups.

Fall teaches us to be active participants in the act of letting go.  Not all change need come from sudden, traumatic events.  If we keep the garden of our hearts actively free from negativity, we open ourselves to cultivate greater outcomes and greater aspects of ourselves.

Here’s to the season of death and rebirth!

 

RESOURCES:

The Gratitude Jar, by Josie Robinson.  
Includes gratitude practice mentioned in this post.

 
 

The Producer Personality: and 3.5 steps to find balance

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As a society, we have a leaning towards our masculine side: the producer personality type. We’re achievers, doers, goal-setters, and task-masters.  We’re often more comfortable giving than we are receiving.  And when a child walks in the door from school, the first thing we ask is: “What did you do today?”


things that should be asked
often. in every type. of
relationship :
how is your heart.
is your breath happy. here.
do you feel free.

- Nayyirah Waheed

 

Producer Tendencies:

When we are overly exerted in our masculine, we become very attached to the way something should go, look, or feel. It’s easy to become headstrong about a goal or an idea.

At any given moment, producers are focused on the next achievement. Often it can feel like happiness is just around the next corner, an always elusive destination. There’s rarely a moment to stand still.

If you’re like me, you were raised in or adopted the tendencies of “hard work,” “life is not easy,” “no free rides,” “if I don’t do it nobody will”...

Eventually, we tie our self-worth to our achievements, and bolt it together for safe-keeping. Life becomes a rapid routine of hurtling one challenge after the next.

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Awareness

Any of those tendencies sound familiar?  

They certainly do to me.  And a great number of my clients as well.

In my own work, I have found that even the slightest change of perspective, or awareness, can create a lot of good in our lives.  

At some point, I became exhausted of chasing endless goals and never really arriving at destination happiness. So I came to my own awarenesses around my producer tendencies, that helped me to heal expand. Here they are:

ONE /// Tomorrow is not guaranteed. I don’t mean to go full-throttle “end of days” here, but let’s be honest.  It’s not. Chasing tomorrow’s happiness is a waste of today’s happiness. Instead of focusing on the BIG items that will make you happy down the line (this job, this amount of money…) focus on the small things that make you happy now.

TWO ///  Work with the power of intention. Instead of goal-setting, consider being of intention. This is the ability to set forth a positive affirmation for yourself.  Think in terms of feeling. Here’s the difference:

Goal - I am going to make one-thousand dollars in sales by October 1, 2016.

Intention - Abundance flows to me, easily and effortlessly, in all forms as I live my divine right livelihood on the planet, now.

Neat. Huh?

TWO & A HALF /// Let go. That’s the beauty of an intention, it creates  s p a c e  for good to show up. Meaning, we’re not trying to fit our good through a straw, instead we open up to allow our good to come in all forms (especially those we could not have conceived on our own).

THREE /// What’s the point of building castles in the sky if there’s nobody there to share the view? One of the biggest tragedies I see in the over-achiever is tendencies of isolation / separation. The gift of focus can foray into the extremes of spiritual separation and separation in our relationships with partners, children, families, or friends. Over achievers are often so independent, or used to going it alone, they have not even considered opening to something beyond his or hers’ own capacity. That’s why it becomes important to open up to receiving help from others. That’s right.  We get by with a little help from our friends.

For an over-achiever this can be as simple as saying YES when someone offers a helping hand.

I distinctly remember a fellow healer offering me the suggestion of being more in my Divine Feminine / receptivity. “How on Earth do I do that?”  I asked. She gave a round of examples of common things we often refuse in the form of service, one of them is allowing someone to hold the door open for us. I remember laughing a bit at the simplicity of this suggestion.  Until the following week when someone offered to hold the door open for me and I literally felt a guttural reaction of “NOOO!!” As if someone holding the door open was insinuating I could not take care of myself - thankyouverymuch.

This can be one of the many signs we’re shutting down our ability to receive.  And folks, what I’ve learned in all of this, is that it’s just as honorable to receive as it is to give.

In my own work, I have found I am far more effective, “productive,” and certainly happier when I round out my masculine tendencies with the strength and power of the Divine Feminine. Together, we become a fluid force, like the breath, able to give and receive.

So let me ask:
 
How is your heart?  
Is your breath happy here?

Do you feel free?

 

Resources

Additional poetry by Nayyirah Waheed:

 
nejma
By nayyirah waheed
salt.
By Nayyirah Waheed